Lunch/Dinner for Breakfast and Everything Else

My day got away from me on Tuesday a little bit. I knew I didn’t have class that night so I pretty much got out of bed in the morning thinking of how to occupy myself before going back to bed that night. As I completely zoned out in front of the TV at nine o’clock in the morning, I skipped my usual breakfast of high fiber cereal and low fat milk. At about eleven o’clock I came to the realization that my stomach was growling. I went to the fridge but it felt too late for cereal and too early for lunch. I needed something…and two slices of leftover cold pizza caught my eye. Cold pizza any time is how I usually run my life, but the rare occasion where it fits in my breakfast schedule makes me wonder what else you could eat besides the typical breakfast fare. I realized that cold pizza is just the beginning.

Now, make no mistake here: breakfast has a lot going for it already. Yeah, we’re talking fresh brewed coffee, sizzling bacon, and hot, fluffy pancakes (unless you are adverse to breakfast carbs). Nothing wrong with waking up groggy and heating up the dirty frying pan, flipping down the toaster, or getting that coffee machine dripping. But there’s also something sinful about eating things that have no business being in your mouth before noon. It makes you feel like a rebel, like you have gone off the beaten path, or in my case, like you are still a college freshman. As I ate my cold pizza and drank sweet tea I came up with these other breakfast substitutes:

- Cake: What’s up, last night’s birthday? We were all stuffed when the flaming sugar slab got wheeled up so most people didn’t eat much. Thank goodness someone put it back in the fridge because now it’s time to kickstart the day with a couple icing flowers. Goes great with morning ice cream.
- Coke: There was a time in my life where I started every day with a Mountain Dew and nothing else. It’s deliciously sinful pouring a tall glass of the brown (yellowish/clear) fizzy at 8:00am. Don’t even try to justify it, either. We understand, friend. We’ve all been there.
- Mix and Match: This is where you stare into your fridge for five minutes and realize you don’t have any good breakfast stuff kicking around. Now it’s time to grab a couple pickles, spoonful of peanut butter, and some slices of bologna before putting the backpack on and running out the door. Works best after late parties where the second round of appetizers is ignored due to booze consumption.
- Regular breakfast food with a key ingredient missing: If you grew up in the hood then you know there were days where milk was not around, so your ‘rents told you to put water on your Cheerios. Sure, maybe it’s disgusting, but sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do. If you’ve ever smeared strawberry jam on your pancakes or eaten a plate of eggs with a handful of Ritz crackers, then you know what we’re talking about.
- Breakfast Grillin’: Flip on the gas and get grilling. You can try whipping up bacon or eggs out there if you want to keep the classics, but frankly, if you’re ever gonna do sausages or wieners, now’s the time. Great for camping or cottages.
- Leftover takeout: Open up your fridge and get ready for that surprise Styrofoam wake up call. Nothing like some snow peas and cross-cut carrots soaking in an ice-cold bath of soy sauce to get the day started with a salty jolt. There is a warning on this one, don’t take your roommates leftovers cause they’ll end up eating whatever you thought you were going to have for lunch.

Now, morning is generally time for slow movements and soft tastes. Most of us baby our tongues with oatmeal muffins, scrambled eggs, or some butter on toast. But that’s why it’s fun eating ridiculous things for breakfast once in a while. You’re drawing outside the lines, ripping up the rules, and adding adventure to your morning. Bring on the day! I will eat this two day old spicy steak and peppers! I will garnish my fried eggs with crushed barbeque flavored potato chips! I will eat the cupcakes leftover from my niece’s birthday party! Seize the day, readers, seize the day!